You look like Brad Pitt's Aunt
And other great messages sent to me
This is our second round of strange messages. I’m sorry if I didn’t include you this time. Please don’t feel offended. If I did include you and you are offended anyway, well, maybe next time you won’t send weird unsolicited messages to a stranger on the internet.
Here we go
I’m sorry but this question is totally a setup. You might even be a Fed. I refuse to talk about vaccines 99% of the time because it is such a controversial topic. It doesn’t matter what side people are on they aren’t open to nuance. Vaccine maxis and anti-vaxers both have issues. I’ma stay out of it. Can’t win this one.
There is something about Men sending me messages about sperm and their penises. Is it a fetish? Are they trying to hit on me? I just don’t get it. The number of messages I get like this is absurd. I just want to make it clear in case it wasn’t, don’t send me messages about your penis or sperm. If I can make someone live forever it won’t be you.
I’m gonna admit that this one is pretty cool. Besides spelling my name wrong multiple times I don’t mind being your muse. You can use my name and likeness all you want unless you make like a billion dollars and then I might ask for you to throw a little money my way, ya’ know?
I can’t tell if the first one is an insult or not? Is Brad Pitt’s Aunt cute? I don’t know. She seems like someone who would be pretty cute. Mental health counseling? I would have you know that I already goto therapy. It’s not a bad thing. Everyone should go at some point in their life. But yeah, you want to be famous? Well, random people send you random insults. My favorite though is, “Your face is the face version of crocs.” that was a pretty good one.
What if organisms that can live in extreme environments are gods but they are just stuck in a Tardigrade body? What if you end up with the terrible extremophile power like - can survive in very salty environments? That would be laaammmeee. Can we just shove your DNA into an extremophile bacteria and call it a day?
Nope, sorry. I’m not gonna make NFTs. I haven’t sold my soul that much. Yet. Never say never I guess but if I’m trying to convince you to buy jpegs of shitty art reach out to me and see if I’m doing ok.